How Did I Meet My Wife

For my two kids, well, how did I meet your mother?

During one of my Certified Professional Trainer classes, I was asked this question “How did you meet your wife?”. So, here it is, the full story of how did we meet.

In my earlier blogs, I mentioned that I had pen friends (those were the era way before the existence of the internet, emails, Facebook and whatever people nowadays use). Those were the days when you had to write letters to people faraway. I had two pen friends from England and a number from Malaysia and Singapore. The ones from England, I received their addresses from my classmate. How did I get the ones from Malaysia and Singapore? End of 1976, I had sent my picture and my address in a local entertainment magazine. It was published much later in early 1977 when I was in the Fourth Form in secondary school. Several of my friends mentioned “Hey, Muz. I saw your picture in that magazine’s pen-pal column”. Well, I had forgotten about that already. A few weeks later, I received several letters from KL, Negeri Sembilan, Kuching and Singapore.

One letter was from a girl in Kuala Lumpur. She wrote that she had lived in Taiping before her family moved to Kuala Lumpur and she asked “Can we be friends?”. I thought, why not. That was how our friendship began. Along the years, we exchanged pictures, sent birthday and Hari Raya cards.

We wrote to each other for several years and we had not met at all. I first met her in the end of 1980. She informed me that her family will move to their new house at Taman Permata, Ulu Kelang. Two of my brothers had also bought their houses at the same place. When I made a trip to KL to visit my brother, I made a point to visit this female penfriend of mine. I walked to the front-door grille(the gate was open) and I saw a glance of a girl inside. I recognized her from the picture she had sent me and I said “psst psst”. She turned around and asked “Yes, who are you looking for?” It seemed that she had not recognized me. I introduced myself, “Hi. I am Muzaffar from Taiping”. Only then, she recognized me. That was really the first time we saw each other.

When I got my first real job as a Bank Clerk 1981, that was when we met regularly, usually on Saturday afternoon (those were the years we had to work half-day on Saturday). She was doing her STPM back then, at TAR College, if I am not mistaken. We could only meet on Saturdays because her parents would not allow her to go out on any other days. Our regular meeting spots were A&W near Ampang Park, KFC or A&W Jalan Tunku Abdul Rahman and sometimes at Bukit Bintang or Sungai Wang Plaza. Back then, Jalan Ampang would have the worst of traffic jams on Saturdays due to the races (the Selangor Turf Club was located there, where KLCC Twin Towers are now located). People of KL were thankful for the existence of the Mini Bus, who the “dare devil” drivers would squeeze through traffic jams to get to their destinations.

When I was transferred to the Bank’s branch at Simpang, Taiping, I would make monthly trips to KL to meet my girl. Ah! What a young man got to do for his girl. This monthly trips went on until 1983 when I got a job as Systems Operator in the Bank’s EDP Department in KL. Then, we would resume dating on Saturdays. At this time, she had already got a job as a Clerk in a company called The Yellow Pages. Sometimes, we would meet for lunch or we would go to the movies. The regular cinemas that we went to were the Federal (Jalan Ipoh), The Rex (Foch Avenue, near Petaling Street) or the Cathay (Bukit Bintang) and sometimes the Odeon (Campbell Road).

On several occasions, I would even visit her at her home at Taman Permata. On one of the visits, her father hinted when would we get married. Hmm, marriage? I answered in positive of my intentions to marry his daughter but I would need some time to save up some money.

In June 1985, we got married with the usual Akad Nikah ceremony followed by the khenduri a few days after. Many of our relatives and friends came to our khenduri. It was a simple celebration held at her father’s house. Please do not laugh where we went for our honeymoon. We spent several days in Taiping, visiting my side of the family. We also visited the “KTM 100 Years Anniversary” exhibition that was held near Taiping Railway Station. After, Taiping we spent a few days visiting her relatives at Sungai Siput and Ipoh.

When we returned to KL, we began to look for a rented house to stay. I was fortunate to be able to rent my brother’s house at Taman Permata (he was transferred to Ipoh for several years).

So, that was the new chapter of my live as a husband to the girl I never expect to meet. What started as pen-friends, writing letters to each other and then, got married.

 

Our marriage has been blessed with two wonderful children (who are now young adults). I am thankful to Allah for this wonderful chapter of my live.

 

 

My wife, Asmah binti Hamzah.

Weekend At Taiping 17 Aug 2013

View from my room window

To cure my Taiping blues, I made a trip to my hometown for the weekend. This time, I got a room with a view facing the Lake Gardens at the Flemington Hotel.The lakes were dried up a little bit due to the dry season in the past two months but the view of the greenery was just beautiful.

I contacted a few friends to meet up after dinner that night but only Karunamurthy was available. He came by the hotel to pick me up and we went to A.Rahman Restaurant near the Land Office . There was a crowd at the restaurant due to the Arsenal vs Aston Villa soccer match on TV. We chatted over drinks until almost midnight.

 

I woke up in the morning with an aching back. Age must be catching with me with regards to long distance driving. After breakfast, I took a short walk around the Lake Gardens near the hotel. Just before that, my wife rang me up to inform that our daughter’s boyfriend and his parents will be coming over to visit at her mother’s house in KL. I made a quick decision to return to KL soon after my morning walk.

 

 

 

 

Despite my aching back, the walk took me an hour. I also took some pictures. In spite of the dried up lakes, the gardens just still look beautiful. There were several groups of couples having the photo session around the gardens. I sat at one of the park bench not far from the hotel to rest and to soak in the serenity and the view. My brief peace was disturbed by one of the couples who asked permission to use the bench for their photo shoot. I obliged after telling them that I have a backache and just needed awhile to rest. The young couple said thanks as I got up to return to the hotel.

Upon reaching my room, I packed up my bags and checked out from the hotel. Well, that’s my brief stay in Taiping and I will be coming back home again. Now, got to go back to KL to meet the parents of my daughter’s boyfriend.

 

Weekend Trip To Taiping

Just booked a room at Flemington Hotel. Requested for a room that faces the Lake Gardens.

Looking forward to wake up in the morning with a beautiful view and go for a walk.

Hopefully, it will not rain.

Final Teen Year - Nineteen in 1980

My idle (and quite dull) life spilled over into the year of 1980. I took up driving lessons with the help of a Chinese shopkeeper whom we knew as Ah Guan. My old dad's Fiat 124ST was the car that I learnt to drive with. We went to the one end of the aerodrome where it was safe to learn and practice (the one which lead to Kampong Tekkah and Aulong). I noticed that there were one or two other cars with learner drivers there too.

After several weeks of practice, I gained confidence in how to drive the car. However, Ah Guan suggessted that I enroll at a Driving School to get proper lessons, especially on how to park. My mom agreed and he took me to register with a Driving School in Taiping. Upon registration, I was informed by the elderly woman clerk that I will have to prepare to sit for the Road Regulations Test first. The test will be held in one month time at Ipoh JPJ. I was given a book to read and understand all the Road Signs and the safe driving guides.

With nothing else to do, I studied the Road Signs booklet and was able to identify every one of them by heart. The test day came and I was prepared and confident. I boarded an old Datsun 120Y (the early, boxy one) with two other young chaps and the instructor drove us to Ipoh JPJ. When we arrived, we were ushered to wait for our turn at the two or three rooms for the test. My name was called and I entered the room. The method of the test back then was, the testor opened a page that had 20 road signs, pointed to each of them and the candidate had to describe the rules in detail. I got them all correct and passed. Two weeks later I received my Learner Driver's License.

The following week, I began the actual driving lessons. I was scheduled to one hour of driving lessons per week. My instructor was an elderly Chinese man in his late 40's and he usually had a toothpick in his mouth. His breath always smelled of cigarettes. I got bored to be learning the street drive around the Taiping Lake Gardens. After my third lesson, I asked the lady clerk that I would like to learn how to park and the uphill drive quickly. I request so that I could get my Driver's License quickly. That gentle old man of my instructor changed into a very abusive, cussing man. Wow! Just because I asked to expedite my driving lessons.

For all the heaps of abusive cussing he threw at me for whatever mistakes I made in the Parking and Uphill sessions, I just kept quiet. I was determined to pass the driving test on my first attempt.

After eight weeks of lessons, I registered for the Driving Test. That old man instructor expressed his doubts, that I would not pass. The lady clerk said something in Chinese, "Let him try. After all, he is paying for the lessons and the test. Not you". That comment made him madder still.

When the test day came, I was in a confident mood. I did all the tests smoothly, the parking was good, the uphill was perfect and the emergency brake was tight. Hell yes! I passed all the tests on my first attempt. That old man just kept quiet after he saw my results. In two weeks time, I received my full Driver's License.

Those were the times, if you pass, you would get a full drivers license, not a two-year Probation one. I felt proud to have that Driver's License.

Finally, I could drive my old Dad's car without fear. I became my mother's chauffer after that. I would drive her to the market, visit her friends or our relatives around Taiping, Ipoh, Bagan Serai and Parit Buntar.

This went on until I got my first real job as a Bank Clerk in Kuala Lumpur in 1981.

Approaching Hari Raya Aidil Fitri 2013

For many, this day of Eid would be a very happy celebration. For me, well, not to very happy one.

Just missing my mother very much still.

For the long weekend, I just feel lost of what to do. Thinking of going back to Taiping for a short visit would sure cure this blues.

Perhaps, I would be able to meet up with some old school buddies.